Monthly Archives: October 2015

Weekly, News, Blog, by, Winston, Churchill, the, Cat, October, 12, 2015

My namesake says….(song works for cat this week)

The truth is controvertible. Malice may attack it,  ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is.

(The Winston started to see a boring pattern of headlines…hence the small hiatus til the humans could do anything but repeat themselves….thats the cat’s explanation, and he’s standing by it). Cat bores easily with humans.

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Hairball Award for the Week

Cruelest joke EVER? Dad uses a dummy to prank his girlfriend into thinking their son has been blown up in a quad bike accident.

Cat says moron should have his eyes scratched out…after all, he’s not a male…he can’t even make her an honest female.

Cat sees this future queer as a LOSER, and cat has friends to carve that word out on ass wipes forehead for no charge.

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Cat Flap Award for the Week

EXCLUSIVE: Ex-Scientologist Leah Remini braces for blow back as she takes down the Church, Tom Cruise and Kirstie Alley in her blistering expose’ ‘Troublemaker’

Cat now likes a human named Remini for seeing beyond the psycho babble of HUBBARD…and the ship of fools he brought with him…CRUISE, ALLEY, and TRAVOLTA…

Cat right, fucked up boogety boogety religion wrong. High paw to Remini cat.

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Cat Litter Award for the Week

Poiltical issues, meeting country leaders and using her status to do good: The author of Kim Kardashian’s new biography argues its time to start taking the star seriously.

KRIS JENNER I DO WEDDINGS… For My Famous Friends.

Cat just threw a hairball laughing so hard

Cat says the fat ass  younger implanted one can’t spell Presidential, and can’t even write her own biography because the written word evades her…enter author here.

Did the author write fat ass didn’t even graduate the simpliest school?…author got paid, author sees a good thing to pay the rent. Maybe author went to the school of dummy fat ass…they do that in the REPUBLIC OF CALIFORNIA….alot.

CAT LAUGHS MORE HERE…

Beyond that, when Cat saw fat ass being questioned by an interviewer, with a question of, “What do you want to be remembered for.?”…

FAT ASS comeback was,

“I want to be respected for my career.”…

Cat fell off fluffy pillow, and rolled on its back in cat barrel laughter…

Cat says….WHAT CAREER FAT ASS?

Cat says to the fat ass being called a STAR by author?

To BE a STAR clueless author and fat ass…know this…., one must have talent…to have talent (let me spell it out the word talent for you realllllyy slow)….

…one must be able to write, sing, act,  etc., or be a being a functioning literate of some kind…of which you have none, zero, nada…(maybe you should have your also no talent PIMP mother explain it to you)…

COURSE THE WAY YOUR SO CALLED NO NOTHING CAREER IS GOING FAT ASS… IS BECAUSE YOUR PIMP MOTHER IS NOW REALIZING YOUR ONLY BOOKINGS IS NOW FOR OPENING GROCERY STORES….

On….(The MOTHERS FAMOUS FRIENDS?)  MORE CAT LAUGHTER.

Bring them all into one room, PIMP MAMA,  and cat says about a half a point of talent from cat for the the whole group for their also no nothing ?what? talent? which made them famous…..

Again, thats the PIMP MENTALITY. THE WHOLE CLAN IS PIMPED OUT…cat straight up about this…

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Tail to the Screen Award for the Week

Military officer recommends no jail time for Bowe Bergdahi.

Since officer can’t see the crime of treason against the US, then officer needs to do the time instead.

Release Phil Spector!

Cat says no to releasing the fruit loop…leave wig boy where he is.

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Right to the Guillotine, do not Pass Go Award

Dentist who killed Cecil the Lion will NOT face charge in Zimbabwe.

NO MORE PIGGING OUT Adminstration chops pork from federal prison menu.

Woman arrested for trying to abduct and sexually assault 17 year old girl who jumped fom moving car to escape.

Pennsylvania college football player accused of stabbing teammate with corkscrew in dorm fight.

Cat says solve some of prison food problems…cut up Dentist and serve it up.

Cat says pedophile dullard, and ungrateful punk ass PA kid need to be chopped first…expedite them to the front of the line…

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Hide in the Bushes til the Noise Stops Award for the Week

Chelsea Clinton demonstrates her thick skin as she smiles her way through book signing while man asks: “Would you say Bill Clinton targets teenage girls for sexual reasons?’

Obama loses his cool as he is challenged again and again by CBS host on ’embrassing failures’ and a ‘lack of leadership’ over his handling of Syria.

Cat sees older and younger versions of sociopaths…

with Antichrist in Chief finishing his checklist of his heros, HITLER, AND NAPOLEON…he looks to pass the olive branch of vile to the clueless female (couldn’t get laid with a fistful of $50’s in a male prison human) Clinton…

CAT LAUGHS AS THE DARK SIDE GOES DOWN.

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Cat Realm Award for the Week

Televison: Blood and Oil

Johnson, perfect. Cat gets off and licks his fun part on great story writing.

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Cat Jumps and Failures of the Week

Jumps.

Mystery young man who allowed a special needs stranger to hold his hand on a Candian bus steals hearts online.

Rescued from the dinner table: Shocking moment Russian police intercept rare Amur tiger cub being smuggled on black market.

‘Honestly, you saved my life’: Blind high school student thanks the ‘hero’ boy who jumped in and stopped a bully from beatin him up.’

Cat appaulds true heroes with good cat breeding from mama and papa cats.

Failures.

Memphis police officer who was expecting his first child dies after being shot multiple times on his way to work.

Son gets speeding ticket while driving heart attack suffering dad to hospital.

Cat growls at the thugs who did this in Memphis,.

Cat scratches eyes out of the cruelty of the other cop for not giving the poor kid a police escort to the hospital.

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More next week from yours truly,

Winston Churchill the Cat…a Formidable, and Sturdy Cat…

www.winstonchurchillthecat.com

Weekly, News, Blog, by, Winston, Churchill, the, Cat, September, 30, 2015

My namesake says….

We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.

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Hairball Award for the Week

‘White friends, pay for my therapy’: Asian woman wants white people to pay for her treatment for stress after years of ‘institutional racism’.

Florida preschool teacher, 40, ‘seduced her 12 year old daughter’s boyfriend, 15, into to having sex and then told him she was pregnant’

Cat to Asian…seriously? Why does it have to be white? Cats come in calico colors to contribute to your fruit l o o p therapy…go with that you ‘t a r d.

Florida is ALWAYS at the top of the list for child ANYTHING. Must be in the cat water dishes down there.

Cat make these two his bathroom maintenance attendees with their mentality.

Cat right. Those two need their own cat island that gets overcome by a tsunami.

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Cat Flap Award for the Week

Georgia woman set to die after parole board refuses last minuute plea for clemency – despite Pope Francis’ calls for halt to her execution

Republicans slam Planned Parenthood chief over secretly filmed abortion videos as Congress spars over a half – BILLION in funding – although the group is ‘making a ton of dough’

Georgia woman kills her man, gets the political/strike that/former regligious one to make a call…to no avail in Georgia.

A half Billion to the crushing of baby heads at PP, and the Chief still has a job.

Seems to this cat, that Georgia could have found another bed when they offed the hubby

slayer up to the heavens for the PP Chief.

Humans, civil is criminal, and criminal is criminal.

The problem with humans is they don’t know that they’re one and the same.

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Cat Litter Award for the Week

Why Hillary’s feminists are suffering from Fiorina envy.

One looks like a hedgehog, and one looks like a chipmunk.

Cat all about the animals, but not when they are in human form, and really really ugly.

Apparently, women have a low opinion of their image in the mirror.

For example:

Plus size woman who battled severe bulimia and depression reveals how she conquered her personal demons to become a social media star with more than 95,000 followers.

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Tail to the Screen Award for the Week

US failing to stop most Americans trying to join ISIS, House study says.

ISIS planning ‘nuclear holocaust’ to wipe hundreds of millions from face of the earth’, claims reporter who embedded with extremists.

The Antichrist Illegal in Chief couldn’t find his cat penis with two roadmaps, and a neon

sign. Why is cat surprised that ISIS will take their religious (perfect example why religions don’t work) boogety boogety by force to overcome dum dum in chief ignoring evil (strike that, his friends).

Cat suspects that moron in Chief secretly is a card carrying member of ISIS.

Hell, by this demonic standard by Amatuer in Chief ignoring the obvious, even Putin looks good here.

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Hide in the Bushes til the Noise Stops Award for the Week

NOTHING CHANGES HERE…

ONE. CLINTON STILL FAT, LYING, AND QUEER AS SHE KEEPS PRETENDING SHE

WILL BE PRESIDENT EVEN THOUGH SHE LET 4 GUYS DIE IN BENGHAZI. (The email fiasco is just cat sauce here).

Seven deadly sins, Hillary, seven deadly sins.

TWO. TRUMP HAS A MOMENT AS HE BACK PEDDLES HIS LEAD BY SAYING HE IS CHILDLIKE. 

GET OVER IT TRUMP, ONCE YOU DANCE TO YOUR WEAKEST LINK, YOU BECOME

CNN, MSNBC, FOX, ALL ROLLED INTO ONE.

DON’T MAKE CAT COME THERE.

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Cat Realm Award for the Week

Movies: Entourage

It wasn’t THAT bad…though it needed more Ari Gold.

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More next week from yours truly,

Winston Churchill the Cat…a Formidable, and Sturdy Cat…

www.winstonchurchillthecat.com