Monthly Archives: July 2015

Weekly, News, Blog, by, Winston, Churchill, the, Cat, July, 25, 2015

My namesake says….

“Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room.”

***************************

Hairball Award for the Week

Rachel Dolezal New Tangled Web of Weaves and Braids

Under Obama, 2.5 Million Illegal Immigrants Have Come Across The Border

Cat says the Dolezal is one of those tangled stray cats, again, upchuck, upchuck, upchuck.

******************************

Cat Flap Award for the Week

Why Obama Blames the Right for Everything

Dems Defend Planned Parenthood by Denying Reality

Horrific MSNBC Panel Defends Smashing Baby Skulls, Selling Fetus Parts for Profit

Cat knows not to crush kitten cute heads, these humans need flash cards to get it through theirs.

******************************

Cat Litter Award for the Week

Martin O’Malley: Climate Change Caused ISIS

Winston runs for President because of humans like this.

********************************

Tail to the Screen Award for the Week

Attacker Threatened to Cook Dead Man, Feed Him to His Sister

Cat has thought it, but decided jail time wasn’t worthy of the end result. Humans have no control, and do it anyhow.

*********************************

Hide in the Bushes til the Noise Stops Award for the Week

Clinton Will Appear before Committee Investigating Benghazi Attacks

Cat loves to watch  the queer one attack the fraidy cats when they ask her questions, and she lies through her snarls.

Citizens Guard Armed Forces Recruiting Center

Cat meows, washes his face in gratitude, and wags his tail.

**********************************

Cat Realm Award for the Week

Television: Any Burn Notice rerun

Cat pays attention. Cat loves to see the action. Cat thinks this is what good television is. A good story, and well written. Cat right.

*********************************

More next week from yours truly,

Winston Churchill the Cat…a Formidable, and Sturdy Cat…

Weekly, News, Blog, by, Winston, Churchill, the, Cat, July, 20, 2015

My namesake says….

“A lie gets around the world before the truth gets its pants on.”

***************************

Hairball Award for the Week

Obama Collecting Personal Data for a Secret Race Database

Cats don’t have secret stuff, we know where our cat boxes are, who are enemies are, and who likes us. We don’t think we’re the antichrist in cat history, or that we can connive a frail cat by fear, or waste time trying to know all his secrets.

Course humans on the other hand, are morons when it comes to the nitty gritty of evolution. They think they can control it. Dumb humans…dumb, dumb, dumb.

******************************

Cat Flap Award for the Week

Obama Visits Prison to Call for a Fairer Justice System

San Francisco Sheriff Defends Release of Immigrant Alledged Killer

Considering the scaredy cat reaction to the underlying event that killed a sweet girl human in San Francisco…these two humans should just blow each other.

In the cat world, that would be the worst of the worst punishment.

******************************

Cat Litter Award for the Week

Kerry Defends Giving Iran 24 day Head’s Up before Nuclear Inspection

Cat thinks this is a misprint…supposed to say…’before Nuclear Engaging, Targeting, and Firing?’

Cat right, human Heinz cat wrong.

********************************

Tail to the Screen Award for the Week

Having a Whale of a Time in a Heatwave: Beluga Lives Up to its Star Billing at Tokyo Water Park by Cooling Down the Crowd with a Squirt as Japan Bakes in 34C Heat.

Cat loves big white Beluga, makes all the little stuff in a cat’s world seem insignificant, for example:

Kendall Jenner ‘I Got a New Accessory’ … A Nipple Ring

*********************************

Hide in the Bushes til the Noise Stops Award for the Week

Obama Admin Looks to Ban Some Social Security Recipients from Owning Guns

Cat has constitution. Antichrist does not.

Cat can read, understand, lead, and officate the rest of the cats because of it. Antichrist can’t remember where he was born.

Trump-eting Their Bias Huff Decides it Won’t Cover Trump as Politics

Donald Trump Huffington Post Refuses to Acknowledge Candidacy

Cat thinks Huff has got too much sterioids in their Starbucks  drinks. Cat goes on tycoon’s announcement, and doesn’t think he’s making it up, while, Cat thinks Huff is just trying to sell litter box lining.

Cat declares Huff people can’t get their human heads through the door, or have let the door hit them too many times in the noggin, making them stuttering nani nani cats.

Cat thinks a good hump for the Huff people will shut them up.

**********************************

Cat Realm Award for the Week

Television: Brink

Cat cracks up, wags his tail, and knows that government humans are just that funny.

Strong Meows, and other paw behavior, here from Cat and his friends.

*********************************

More next week from yours truly,

Winston Churchill the Cat…a Formidable, and Sturdy Cat…

Weekly, News, Blog, by, Winston, Churchill, the, Cat, July, 12, 2015

My namesake says….

“Never, never, never give up.”

***************************

Hairball Award for the Week

EXCLUSIVE – Glenn Beck Launches Outspoken Attack on Caitlyn Jenner: Controversial Radio Host Tells the World ‘Don’t Tell me to Start Calling Him a Woman’

Kendall and Caitlyn Jenner THIS IS HOW WE ROLL Sushi Date in Bev Hills

In a cats world, we know the difference…if its still attached, you are a boy Bruce cat.

******************************

Cat Flap Award for the Week

Ariana Grande

Bails on MLB Concert
‘I Hate America’ Backlash to Blame?

Cats have respect for their territory, and in that respect they know where they’re bread is buttered from.

******************************

Cat Litter Award for the Week

Top Drug Lord Joaquin ‘El Chapo’ Guzman known as Mexico’s Osama Bin Laden Escapes from Prison for the SECOND Time after Breaking Out through Secret Mile-Long Tunnel System.

The SECOND TIME?

When the former Karam announces that Chapo’s imprisonment in the US will save Mexico money….it just goes to show thats the reason that cats don’t acknowledge tom foolery…again, humans and the price of greed. Not a cat thing at all.

********************************

Tail to the Screen Award for the Week

Smug San Francisco Sheriff Blames Everyone Except Himself For Kate Steinle Murder…

In the cat world, we know when we’ve been beat…we slink away and lick our paws in defeat. Humans have ego that screws with that process.

*********************************

Hide in the Bushes til the Noise Stops Award for the Week

Obama is Facing the Prison Facts

De Blasio is Missing in Action as City goes Downhill

One communicates with his water level friends, and the other is a scaredy cat.

Trump Wants to Charge Mexico $100K for Every illegal immigrant

Cats like treats, and if money buys treats, and getting something back from treats, well its a good thing in the cat world. We never turn down money related treats. Tycoon rocks here.

**********************************

Cat Realm Award for the Week

Box Office: ‘Minions’ Boasts Record $115.2M Debut for $395.7M Global Total

Just goes to show that the smallest cutest fellas who are in the moment can make the humans boo coo … in the cat world…its okay to be a kitten every once a awhile.

*********************************

More next week from yours truly,

Winston Churchill the Cat…a Formidable, and Sturdy Cat…

Winston, Churchill, the Cat, Weekly, News, Blog, July, 5, 2015

My namesake says….

“However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results.”

***************************

Hairball Award for the Week

Man Dies Instantly After Launching Firework off Head..

This is a perfect example of overthinking a situation, not finishing the 10th grade, and being the example of bad breeding.

Humans, an interesting fare.

******************************

Cat Flap Award for the Week

Four Sex Scandals Rock One Hanky Panky High School.

In my world, we cats wouldn’t have let the 2nd one occur. In our world, we cats would have chased off the administrators to allow them follow their true calling of  lawn maintenance.

Thats what we cats would do. Humans on the other hand love to waste time. We cats like to thin the herd quickly.

******************************

Cat Litter Award for the Week

Greece in Crisis: Exit Polls Predict Narrow Win for ‘No’ Campaign That Could Plunge World Markets into Chaos.

Greece’s Haves and Have Nots: While some Athenians Queue at Soup Kitchens, Others are Hoarding Cash in Safety Deposit Boxes for the Turbulent Weeks Ahead.

Greece on the Brink.

So when the Prime Minister Tsipras smiles broadly after he causes failure to the people, is that a human behavior that means demonic?

If so, we don’t have that expression in my realm.

********************************

Tail to the Screen Award for the Week

Mr. Robot: Television

Stealing, bulging eyed ugly human forms, mind altering chemicals, bad lighting, and a ferris wheel…4 negatives,  and 1 happy place for a cat.

*********************************

Hide in the Bushes til the Noise Stops Award for the Week

  • Bush and Perry Lash out at Trump: Rival GOP Presidential Contenders Say They Are Offended by Tycoon’s Controversial Remarks on Immigrants and He Fires Back at Them.

Are the two just plain jealous that they didn’t tell the truth like the tycoon?

Human jealousy is always an amazement to…us cats.

  • Hillary Clinton Accuses China of Stealing ‘Huge’ Amounts of Government Information’ and Hacking ‘Into Everything That Doesn’t Move in America.’

Look over there, while I do the same thing in sketchier maneuvers over here.

We cats don’t have a deceptive furry place on our body. We don’t understand sleight of paw, sleight of meow, or incite another bad ass                Ocelot to pounce, especially when we owe them something, like money…or would be so sleight as to forget they have war weapons.

We cats wouldn’t be that dumb.

**********************************

Cat Realm Award for the Week

Outrage as Former Disney CEO Michael Eiser Says Funny Women Usually Aren’t Beautiful.

As facial features are always a curious hobby of cats to ponder, and nobody REALLY wants to look at goofy humans, and as far as humans have been from time to time been funny, he speaks the truth.

*********************************

More next week from yours truly,

Winston Churchill the Cat…a Formidable, and Sturdy Cat…